The Invisible Indian Wonder Woman

Wonder woman is not a fiction... Its state of a mind. 

My parents recently celebrated their Ruby Anniversary (40 years) of being together. These forty years were filled with ups and downs, verbal fight outs followed with emotional and sentimental outbursts from both ends. But what always remained is the love and respect. Next day my mother would meticulously again arrange the meds that my father had, keep the sweets aside or just give him one sweet (as we Bengalis cannot end a meal without it).

And, this routine has been still in existence till date as I am writing to you this. When I was born my mother used to complete the household work, drive miles to reach office and when she is to ensure my homework was done and the list is endless. In exchange, I would either get irritated because my play hours would get limited, my dad would ignore her at times because it was his time to watch some English/British soap opera on the telly. At the end there was no one to listen to this woman.

Today as we hit 2020 and needless to say that the principal of women whether married or not has only one thing in her mind - CAREER. And while we or some dedicated members of the ‘Male Chauvinist Society’ (MCS) recite only one motto that the lady of the house should first look at the house and then at herself need to be silenced. We have always ignored rather I must say taken these women for granted both in our personal and professional lives.  The story unfolds itself in 2016 when a guy like me decide to end the world of ‘Bachelorhood’ and donate my freedom to the lady who will be the jailer of my life - at least that is what I had in mind.

People say including me that every man has a typical image of a wife that he desires and vice versa. Let me tell you that list never existed in reality either ways. But, then one fine morning I noticed that I had to rush to office, the breakfast was not made, the clothes were still in the washing machine and if I am lucky today I would just be able to get a pair of smelly jeans, a t shirt thrown in some mystic corner of the cupboard and one wet inner wear that would get dried eventually!  When I returned home, I asked my wife why she did not make breakfast and ensure that I had one set of clothes for my office wear. Her response has since then made me ask her this question as my first and last one till date.

When we marry, in our tradition are asked to tell our mother that we are getting a ‘dashi’ (helper) for you when we used to usher the lady we are marrying in the house. Surprised? Shocked? Startled? … want to break my nose? Well I too share these same expressions when I was told this and so while everything was done in its traditional manner, I ensured that I never uttered these words while getting my would-be wife. And, instead I declared in the utmost clear voice I could that Ma I am getting your daughter to this house! Yes, it shocked, surprised and made some of my old class ideological suckers go silent, but that was it!

As the plane set its foot at the Chhatrapati Shivaji International Airport, I ushered her into my 1 BHK flat in the secluded place of Malad, amidst the hustle bustle of a life she was never used to. - MUMBAI. Today as we complete four years of our adventure filled marriage, it has been a drive on the highway filled with road blocks, romantic moments, and some really nasty moments. But she took each day in her stride kept forgiving me, kept encouraging me and most importantly has always been there by my side. Most importantly, I never bothered about the house because I hardly used to be in it, thanks to my Ad Mad world where the instrument CLOCK does not exist!

Today, the year is the same but my inner world has changed. The breakfast is made, the clothes are clean and the house has become a place to live. And it has been possible just for this one God sent human being… - A daughter to her parents, a sister to her brother, a wife to her husband and a daughter in law to her in laws. But she is something much more than this which we, especially men fail to recognize and respect. She is a Woman. She is a Wonder. She too has dreams which she or people like her of for that matter even my mother have had to sacrifice or let go in order to keep our lives in order. And, now the question that we men need to ask ourselves is that how do we justify ourselves as the ‘better half’ of our ‘better half’?

Well, this time spent at home has made me understand the answer to this. As we were all ‘locked down’ due to the current circumstances, I was immediately directed by my ‘Home Minister’ to make a list of things that need to be completed within this time. While, I hardly bothered to hear her, however just to avoid her banter I pretended to note down the list. Until, I was speechless seeing the same and it’s at that point of time that I realized that while we all have duties and responsibilities to fulfill at our workplace, there is an equal ‘scope of work’ completed by the lady of the house who actually does not even have a designation.

The kind of targets which to some of us seems quite ‘Menial’ or as I would usually tell my wife ‘tuk taak’ (miscellaneous) but otherwise are worst than the ones given to us by our bosses. So, I was asked to complete these all by myself and the reason being that she wanted me to just understand how easy and ‘menial’ these called jobs were. It’s just been a week or more since the lockdown and trust me the kind of work I have completed will probably be the most difficult targets of my life… And such targets which were set by this lady herself and are completed also by herself on a daily basis which goes unnoticed and unappreciated.

And, yet at the end of the day we don’t ask how her day went but rather ask what’s there for dinner! In fact, we don’t even think of surprising her until unless it’s an occasion in place but if you happen to notice that she always surprises you, either by preparing your favourite dish, or by adding something new to the pale wall that not only adds a color to your house but most importantly it brings a smile to your face. The next moment you just finish your dinner, get up and watch the telly while she ends up having food all by herself, clean the dishes and goes to bed all silently.

So, I am now taking this opportunity to thank all these powerful ladies of the house for looking after their better halves by sacrificing their interests and appealing to the ‘other halves’ to better themselves. And, most importantly thank God for sending us our own ‘Invisible Indian Wonder Woman’.